Tarcher Features Week: Parenting & Relationships

November 17, 2013 by  
Filed under Authors, Books, DailyTarcher

Welcome to Tarcher Features Week! Each day this week we will highlight one major Tarcher theme, collecting some of our favorite titles and authors for you to enjoy.

Sunday: Parenting & Relationships

imagesMany Tarcher titles seek to help readers enrich their familial, friendly and romantic relationships. Here are some of our favorite authors and titles covering this theme.

Dr. Daniel Siegel

Renowned neuropsychologist Dr. Daniel Siegel is one of our most popular parenting authors. Some of his titles include:

41ymdn1bdbL._SY346_Between the ages of 12 and 24, the brain changes in important, and oftentimes maddening, ways. It’s no wonder that many parents approach their child’s adolescence with fear and trepidation. According to renowned neuropsychiatrist Daniel Siegel, however, if parents and teens can work together to form a deeper understanding of the brain science behind all the tumult, they will be able to turn conflict into connection and form a deeper understanding of one another.
In Brainstorm, Siegel illuminates how brain development impacts teenagers’ behavior and relationships. Drawing on important new research in the field of interpersonal neurobiology, he explores exciting ways in which understanding how the teenage brain functions can help parents make what is in fact an incredibly positive period of growth, change, and experimentation in their children’s lives less lonely and distressing on both sides of the generational divide.

Advance reviews:

Brainstorm is a must read book for every parent if they want to avoid emotional turbulence in their own lives as their children go through adolescence. It’s lifesaving for the whole family.”
—Deepak Chopra, MD

Brainstorm is eye-opening and inspiring, a great gift to us all—teens, parents of teens, and anyone who wants a full and rich life on this planet. Daniel Siegel shows how the supposed downsides of the teen years all have upsides, and that the lessons for living that await teens are ones any of us, at any age, can learn from.”
Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence

Brainstorm is a necessary look at why adolescents do what they do that can put parents in an emotional frenzy. The information that Dr. Dan Siegel shares is not only invaluable for understanding your growing child’s brain, but helps build more compassion and patience. A gift for us all.”
—Goldie Hawn

“By the end of this book, the teenager has been transformed from a monstrous force into a thinking, feeling, and entirely approachable human being.”
—PUBLISHERS WEEKLY

Read a BRAINSTORM excerpt HERE.

Buy it on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and IndieBound!

 

 

ParentingfromtheInsideOutParenting from the Inside Out: 10th Anniversary Edition by Daniel Siegel and Mary Hartzell

In this book, Siegel and Hartzell present a unique perspective on the “art and science” of building nurturing relationships with our children. Born out of a series of workshops for parents that combined Siegel’s cutting-edge research on how communication impacts brain development with Hartzell’s thirty years of experience as a child development specialist and parent educator, Parenting from the Inside Out guides parents through creating the necessary foundations for a loving and secure relationship with their childre

Read more here!

Buy the newly revised 10th anniversary edition of Parenting from the Inside Out on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and IndieBound

 

Check out some of our other great parenting and relationship titles!

ShapeOfTheEye1The Shape of the Eye by George Estreich

When a baby is born, every parent checks to ensure their child is healthy, looking for the vital 10 fingers and 10 toes. No parent expects the doctor to ask consent for additional testing for Down syndrome. George Estreich and his wife Theresa certainly didn’t.

After two weeks of waiting, of living in denial that little Laura Estreich’s almond-shaped eyes were anything but the vestiges of her Japanese ancestry, the doctor delivered the news: Laura had Down syndrome. THE SHAPE OF THE EYE details all that comes after such a life-changing diagnosis. In this “poignant, beautifully written and intensely moving memoir” (Abraham Verghese, author of Cutting for Stone), poet and stay-at-home dad, George Estreich, relays both his daughter’s story and his struggle to accept and understand the meaning of ‘different.’

Buy it on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

TALK TO ME LIKE I’M SOMEONE YOU LOVE: Expanded & Updated by Nancy Dreyfus

This title highlights the power of written messages to defuse tension and put an end to conflict, offering both sound advice and more than 100 “flashcards for real life” that can be utilized in the heat of the moment. (That’s 25 more flashcards than in the first edition!)

Witnessing the life-changing power of these flashcards in her own therapy sessions, Dreyfus brings this one-of-a-kind relationship tool, along with her extensive and insightful “field notes,” to a broader audience.

“The most crucial relationship advice book since MEN ARE FROM MARS.”–Glamour.com

“Just about any couple using this material could humanize their relationship.”–Harville Hendrix, Getting the Love You Want

Read an excerpt from the book HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

The Artist's Way for Parents

THE ARTIST’S WAY FOR PARENTS: Raising creative children by Julia Cameron

Since its publication over twenty years ago, Julia Cameron’s revolutionary bestseller, The Artist’s Way, has inspired millions—including notables like Alicia Keys, Steven Tyler and Jessica Simpson—and has become the go-to program for artists of all skill levels. Now, Cameron brings readers the most anticipated and requested addition to her canon of work on creativity: THE ARTIST’S WAY FOR PARENTS. In its pages, readers will find an enriching program that parents can enter and re-enter at any pace and at any point in their children’s early years. Focused on parents and children from infancy to twelve years, THE ARTIST’S WAY FOR PARENTS has its roots firmly planted in The Artist’s Way and brings those creativity tools to the next generation. It offers practical exercises to spark innovation, curiosity and connection, and assists parents as they guide their children to greater creativity and, ultimately, greater self-awareness. Read more here.

 

 

ITSOK_coverFINAL-199x300IT’S OK NOT TO SHARE…: and Other Renegade Rules for Raiding Competent and Compassionate Kids by Heather Shumaker

In IT’S OK NOT TO SHARE, author and parent Heather Shumaker describes her quest to nail down “the rules” to raising smart, sensitive, and self-sufficient kids. While Shumaker’s Renegade Rules do flip some popular views upside down, they are really all about extending dignity and compassion in our parenting. Read more here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

If I HaveToTellYouIF I HAVE TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME: The Revolutionary Program That Gets your Kids to Listen Without Nagging, Reminding, or Yelling by Amy McCready

In If I Have to Tell You One More Time…, parenting expert Amy McCready sheds an astonishing new light on the relationship between parent and child. In most environments, positivity has the power to bring out the best in people. Likewise, negativity has the opposite effect, leaving people discouraged and bedraggled. The same can be said for your children, whose behavior is so strongly influenced by your reactions to them. When parents fail to rein in their words, actions or temperament, it can have surprisingly grave effects on their children and—you guessed it—causes them to misbehave (which is exactly what we don’t want). What’s more, sometimes parents fail to recognize the subtle ways they discourage their children. Read more here.

 

 

freeing yourself from the narcissist in your life

“The book is written with a calm directness and achieves the author’s purpose of helping readers identify and protect themselves from naively tangling with these personalities.”

– Library Journal

Healthy narcissism is a good thing.  It is the self-esteem that bolsters us and makes us feel positive about ourselves and our value to society.  But all too often, we come upon a high-level, “toxic” narcissist, a magnetic and ruthless character capable of inflicting great pain and suffering, and all but incapable of doing otherwise.

In this fascinating book, FREEING YOURSELF FROM THE NARCISSIST IN YOUR LIFE, now out in paperback for the first time, psychotherapist Linda Martinez-Lewi delivers an indispensable guide to recognizing, coping with, and ultimately overcoming the destructive behavior of high-level narcissistswhether they be lovers, work colleagues, friends or parents.

Order it on AmazonBarnes&Noble and IndieBound!

Read an excerpt from the book HERE.

 

9781101610206.225x225-7550 WAYS TO PLAY: BDSM for Nice People by Don and Debra Macleod

This pocket-sized book serves as an introduction for beginners to some of the many ways that BDSM can spice up a couple’s sex life. “Sex is supposed to pack a punch,” write the Macleods in the introduction. “It’s supposed to take you off guard, make you hold your breath for what might come next, gasp with discovery, quicken your pulse and consume you, mind, body and soul. Sex should set you on fire, so that an unrecognizable shade of yourself comes alive in the smolder.” Ranging from Japanese rope bondage to voyeurism and from erotic spanking to temperature play, 50 WAYS TO PLAY is a great primer for those who want to bring a little more excitement into the bedroom.

Order it on AmazonBarnes & Noble, or IndieBound.

 

 

freedomfreedomindex

FREEDOM FROM TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS: Moving On from the Family, Work, and Relationship Issues That Bring You Down by Avril Carruthers (out 12/26)

In this uplifting and informative book, transpersonal  psychotherapist Avril Carruthers offers a close look at adult relationships to show why we get involved in toxic relationships in the first place—and how to recognize if you’re involved in one. Carruthers then provides the tools to help readers begin their journey toward healing and learn how to meet the world with a new kind of confidence, so that the cycle of toxic relationships can be broken once and for all.

Order it from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or IndieBound.

 

 

Though many relationship guides tell us how to date, few address the “why?” factor of relationships. That’s exactly what psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel Heller offer in their accessible and groundbreaking book, ATTACHED: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love, now available in paperback.

Combining facts and clear analysis with engaging personal stories from over 100 interviewees, ATTACHED is a fascinating read for anyone with an interest in the “why” behind their actions and relationships.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

 

 

41+ceIRWQwL._SX258_BO1,204,203,200_This simple, straightforward guide to effective communication is for anyone who has ever wanted to “eat their words.”

Do you ever feel that your words produce the exact opposite effect of what you were hoping for—escalating tensions rather than solving problems? Author of Emotional Bullshit Carl Alasko has found that with the right guidance, anyone can learn effective communication skills. In Say This, Not That, Alasko presents readers with simple instructions for what to say . . . and what not to say. Accompanying each pair of statements is a brief discussion of what makes one so negative and destructive, and the other inviting of the kind of discussion needed. This book is the ultimate resource for anyone who longs to consistently say the right thing at the right time.

Purchase on Amazon.

 

freedomfreedom

Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life

August 8, 2013 by  
Filed under Books, DailyTarcher, Great Reads

freeing yourself from the narcissist in your life

“The book is written with a calm directness and achieves the author’s purpose of helping readers identify and protect themselves from naively tangling with these personalities.”

– Library Journal

Healthy narcissism is a good thing.  It is the self-esteem that bolsters us and makes us feel positive about ourselves and our value to society.  But all too often, we come upon a high-level, “toxic” narcissist, a magnetic and ruthless character capable of inflicting great pain and suffering, and all but incapable of doing otherwise.

In this fascinating book, FREEING YOURSELF FROM THE NARCISSIST IN YOUR LIFE, now out in paperback for the first time, psychotherapist Linda Martinez-Lewi delivers an indispensable guide to recognizing, coping with, and ultimately overcoming the destructive behavior of high-level narcissistswhether they be lovers, work colleagues, friends or parents.

How do we identify the truly toxic narcissist?  According to Martinez-Lewi, a true narcissist:

  • Displays an extreme sense of grandiosity and superiority
  • Is highly manipulative, exploitive, and deceptive in all of their relationships
  • Places their personal and professional needs over the needs of others
  • Is captivated by their delusions of limitless power and perfection
  • Easily lies without any qualms of guilt
  • Is incapable of true empathy — the ability to deeply feel and appreciate another person’s emotional state

Martinez-Lewi illustrates her book with tales of several famous high-level narcissists, including artist Pablo Picasso, philosopher-author Ayn Rand, and architect Frank Lloyd Wright, all of whom required crowds of admirers and turned cold and cruel when a follower was no longer useful or was perceived as a threat to the master.  And like these well-known exemplars, many high-level narcissists are extremely charismatic, with the knack for making their inner circle feel a special and intimate connection – until the moment when they are unceremoniously dumped, or worse, punished and humiliated by their former partner/mentor/best friend.

Most importantly, Martinez-Lewi reveals that a high-level narcissist is highly unlikely to change.  Because the narcissist is so convinced of their utter perfection and specialness, they will never be willing to engage in the type of self-examination that might counter their unrealistic self-image.  Whether disguised as a “demanding” mentor, a “difficult” boss, a “fussy” sibling or a “picky” spouse, the toxic narcissist can cast a huge and negative shadow on the lives they touch.

But there is hope if you are entangled with one of these destructive users. In this book, Martinez-Lewi shows you how to recognize these self-centered people and assert your personal boundaries, ultimately Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life.

Order it on AmazonBarnes&Noble and IndieBound!

Read an excerpt from the book HERE.

 

Other recommended reads…

attached-FATTACHED by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller

In this landmark book, authors Amir Levine and Rachel Heller reveal how an understanding of adult attachment-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment posits that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: anxious; avoidant; and secure. ATTACHED guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mate) follow, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love. Read more here!

Valentine’s Day Hangover Cures

February 15, 2013 by  
Filed under Books, DailyTarcher

Was your V-Day a dud? Looking for a fresh start? Check out these great books:

attached-FATTACHED by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller

In this landmark book, authors Amir Levine and Rachel Heller reveal how an understanding of adult attachment-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment posits that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: anxious; avoidant; and secure. ATTACHED guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mate) follow, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love.

Order it on AmazonBarnes & Noble, or Indiebound!

 

9781416550211WOMEN WHO LOVE TOO MUCH by Robin Norwood is a #1 New York Times bestseller that empowers women to ask these hard questions:
  • Do you find yourself attracted again and again to troubled, distant, moody men — while “nice guys” seem boring?
  • Do you obsess over men who are emotionally unavailable, addicted to work, hobbies, alcohol, or other women?
  • Do you neglect your friends and your own interests to be immediately available to him?
  • Do you feel empty without him, even though being with him is torment?

This groundbreaking work will enable you to recognize the roots of your destructive patterns of relating and provide you with a step-by-step guide to a more rewarding way of living and loving.

Order it on Amazon, Barnes&Noble and IndieBound!

 

FREEING YOURSELF FROM THE NARCISSIST IN YOUR LIFE by Linda Martinez-Lewi, PhD presents an in-depth and supportive plan for identifying, understanding, and dealing with high level narcissistic behavior in those close to you. Drawing on detailed profiles of famous narcissists, including Pablo Picasso, Frank Lloyd Wright, Armand Hammer, and Ayn Rand, as well as expertly rendered case studies from her private practice as a psychotherapist, Martinez-Lewi shows how to:

  • understand where narcissistic behavior comes from; u learn to spot narcissistic traits, even in the early stages of relationships;
  • realize why attempting to change a narcissist is fruitless; and
  • protect yourself from the narcissist’s opportunism, manipulative behavior, and lack of empathy.

FREEING YOURSELF FROM THE NARCISSIST IN YOUR LIFE helps readers to liberate themselves from draining personal relationships with narcissists, and shows how to regain a sense of peace, balance, and well-being.

Order it on Amazon, Barnes&Noble and IndieBound!

TALK TO ME LIKE I’M SOMEONE YOU LOVE: Flashcards for Real Life by Nancy Dreyfus features 64 written statements that hold the power to express what you wish you could say to the person you love when you can’t find the right words or tone to do so. On the back of each card are “field notes” from couples with whom therapist and author Nancy Dreyfus has worked, explaining why, when, and how to use the statement.

 

Other recommended reads…

SeekingHappilyEverAfter-F-200x300SEEKING HAPPILY EVER AFTER: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Being Single without Losing Your Mind by Michelle Cove is a practical road map to the challenging and ever-more-lengthy life stage known as singlehood. Packed full of informative sidebars, stories from numerous single women, and advice from an author who’s traveled this confusing road herself, this book offers readers the tools they need to be happy in every stage of singlehood.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on AmazonBarnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

POLL: Valentine’s Day – Should gals buy guys gifts?

February 13, 2013 by  
Filed under Fun Fact, Great Ideas

We asked our Twitter and Facebook followers, as well as our experts, the following question: Should women buy their boyfriend a gift? Many of you voted in our poll (below) and we received some great suggestions (including books – and, hey, we love those!).

Should women buy their boyfriend a gift or is it his job to romance her? What’s your take?

A – Hell yes! We fought for equal rights for a reason

B – Er, I never get my BF a gift. Am I a bad girlfriend?
C – Something small is nice, like a card or a tie

D – He gets his gift late in the evening, if you know what I mean…

 

And, survey says?

C! Most of you think something small is best, like a card or a tie, with option A coming in a close second!

 

Perhaps, @PardyDhillon summed up everyone’s thoughts best with her response: “Well this is the 21st century and life isn’t a Mills and Boon novel!!”

 

Well said.  Alright, let’s get the experts to weigh in…

 

The Expert Take

Expert One: The Lady of “Play”

“A woman should never buy a man a Valentine’s Day gift.  When it comes to relationships, many men have it too easy nowadays.  They’ve lost the art of romance.  We women need to set the bar higher.  Men should have to work harder to enjoy our affection and, yes, sometimes that means making a trip to the mall, parting with some cash and acting like a gentleman.  Anyway, the last thing a real man wants on Valentine’s Day is a card or a trinket.  Let’s face it.  This is the sequence of events he’s hoping for:  A. He will buy you something nice.  B.  You will love it and he will have made you happy.  C.  You will thank him in that ‘special’ way.   On Valentine’s Day, men should ‘buy’ and women should ‘do.’”

 

Expert Two: The “Attached” Fellow

“People like to use gender differences to explain relationship behavior all the time but attachment science positions a much more useful way of looking at our relationships: Through the lens of attachment styles—anxious, avoidant, or secure. Each matches a set of expectations, perceptions and beliefs about relationships. This is also true when it comes to gifts on Valentine’s Day. You’ll only know what is right for your partner by understanding their underlying attachment style.”

 

Joe received a small sketch book from his girlfriend for V day. He had absolutely no need for it. In fact, it will probably just add to the clutter in his home. However he was overjoyed. It’s the thought that counts, and it meant so much to him that she got him something. Maybe it was her way of encouraging him to pursue his love for drawing. Joanne got the exact same gift from her partner. She put it aside and didn’t think much of it. Henry also received the same gift. It was as useless to him as it was to the former two, but he read many negative things into this gift: Tamara, his wife, hadn’t put any thought into buying him the right gift, and he assumed it meant she doesn’t love him as much as he loves her. He gave her the silent treatment when they went to dinner together that night.

 

People like to use gender differences to explain relationship behavior all the time but attachment science positions a much more useful way of looking at our relationships: Through the lens of attachment styles. People have one of three attachment styles: anxious avoidant and secure and each matches a set of expectations, perceptions and beliefs about relationships. This is also true when it comes to gifts on Valentine’s Day. Some will be overjoyed with a small gift. But you’ll only know if your partner is one of those people and what is right for him or her by understanding their underlying attachment style.

Find out more about attachment styles. It will give you a fresh new way to understand and behave in relationships. If you’re single this V day, it will help guide you in choosing the right partner for you!

 

Expert Three: The Lady Who Encourages “Talk”

I’d say the answer was E–None of the Above.  C’mon, you don’t have to be a consciousness giant go see that this is a bit of a silly question.

 

Option A: You don’t give a gift to establish or demonstrate your equality.

Option B: You don’t not give gifts to someone you love.

Option C:  Like A, you don’t have to give a “small gift,” to not overdo it.

Option D: You don’t “give” sex as a Valentine’s Day Gift – that’s what chocolates are for.

 

Option C might have something to recommend it in the right spirit, the problem with the offered choices is that they are all strategic–calculated to prove: I am your equal….I am a princess….I am cool and not boy-crazy….I am sexually generous.  Valentine’s Day, in my picture, should be a day about love, not strategy.  You like that guy?  I say give him a gift that really shows it.  It could be a week without criticism, a cashmere coat, a gift certificate for a massage or a single rose.

 

And think of it this way:  If you unabashedly give a fabulous gift from your heart, I can virtually promise you that by the end of the evening you’ll be feeling like a cool, sexually generous, highly respected Princess.  Neither follow your mother’s rules nor be hell-bent on breaking them.  Just let yourself love the way you have always wanted to – Valentine’s Day and every day after.

Superheroes: Anxious, Avoidant, or Secure?

July 16, 2012 by  
Filed under Books, DailyTarcher, Great Reads

Welcome to the summer of the superhero! With THE AVENGERS starting off the summer with a billion-dollar bang, THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN swinging into cinemas earlier this month, San Diego Comic-Con just behind us, and THE DARK KNIGHT RISES coming out on July 20, superheroes are now at the forefront of our popular culture.

With that in mind, here’s a question that we’ve long wondered: All that business about x-ray vision and invulnerability aside, what would our favorite superheroes be like when in a romantic relationship or on a date?

We here at Tarcher/Penguin consulted Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller’s groundbreaking book on the science of adult attachment, ATTACHED, to help us decide. For example, we figured that Peter Parker (Spider-Man) would be ‘secure’, while Bruce Wayne (Batman) would be ‘avoidant’. Of course, there are plenty of other characters who fit these relationship styles! Therefore, we’re turning it over to you, our readers, to answer the question of the day:

What’s your favorite superhero’s relationship style?

For reference, here are the 3 distinct relationship behavioral styles as laid out in ATTACHED:

ANXIOUS people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner’s ability to love them back.

AVOIDANT people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.

SECURE people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving.

 

Purchase ATTACHED on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or IndieBound.

Valentine Books for Couples and Singles Alike!

February 13, 2012 by  
Filed under Books, DailyTarcher

Whether you’re going stag on Valentine’s Day or dragging around a ball and chain, here are some great book ideas (or gift ideas!) to get you through the day.

If you’re single:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SEEKING HAPPILY EVER AFTER: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Being Single without Losing Your Mind by Michelle Cove is a practical road map to the challenging and ever-more-lengthy life stage known as singlehood. Packed full of informative sidebars, stories from numerous single women, and advice from an author who’s traveled this confusing road herself, this book offers readers the tools they need to be happy in every stage of singlehood.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

ARE ALL GUYS A**HOLES? by Amber Madison debunks the myth that guys are sex-obsessed, commitment-phobic, beer-in-hell-serving assholes. She explains that not only do men find comfort in relationships, they fall in love faster than women, and they fall out of love harder. Just like women, they yearn for emotional connection and companionship. Drawing on the results of Madison’s nationwide survey, which  she administered to more than 1,000 guys over the course of a year, she makes the case that deep down, (most) guys aren’t the jerks that everyone, including themselves, think they are.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

EVERY ROSE HAS ITS THORN by Erin Bradley outlines ten “types” of guys — based on America’s most beloved and notorious rock stars — to help you decode and take charge of your dating life. Whether you’re with a “Mannish Boy” like Bret Michaels; looking to end a relationship with “Mr. Big Stuff” (i.e., the Kanye Wests of the world); or pining for a “Sweet Child o’ Mine” (Jonas Brothers, anyone?), this book helps you weigh the pros and cons of dating each type. Filled with quizzes, quirky illustrations, and a “who’s who” of rock stars for each type, this book helps readers navigate the men many of us encounter in the dating world.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

 

If you’re taken:

 

 

 

 

 

 

BEYOND BLAME by Carl Alasko delves deep into the subject of blame, tackling why it’s so harmful and what we can do to banish it from our lives. For most of us, the urge to blame is so ingrained that we do it without thinking. This habit extends from minor situations (a spilled drink) to major ones (war, natural disaster) but, according to Alasko, even the smallest instance of blame carries consequences.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

SHUT UP & DANCE by Jamie Rose is the story of how the author learned what it means to “let go” through dancing, and how it affected the way she lived and loved for the better. In a breezy style full of joie de vivre, Rose  recounts her struggle with romantic relationships—from unhealthy dependency to combative independence—and how the principles of great partner dancing opened her eyes to all the things she had been doing wrong.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

TALK TO ME LIKE I’M SOMEONE YOU LOVE: Expanded & Updated by Nancy Dreyfus highlights the power of written messages to defuse tension and put an end to conflict, offering both sound advice and more than 100 “flashcards for real life” that can be utilized in the heat of the moment. Witnessing the life-changing power of these flashcards in her own therapy sessions, Dreyfus brings this one-of-a-kind relationship tool, along with her extensive and insightful “field notes,” to a broader audience.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

For everyone:

 

ATTACHED by Amir Levine, M.D. and Rachel Heller – Though many relationship guides tell us how to date, what games to play or how to behave in marriage, few address these questions head on and provide answers based on the latest scientific research. However, that’s exactly what psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and social-organizational psychologist Rachel Heller offer in their accessible and groundbreaking book. Combining facts and clear analysis with engaging personal stories from over 100 interviewees, ATTACHED is a fascinating read for anyone with an interest in the “why” behind their actions and relationships.

Read an excerpt HERE.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

Smoking Guns That Indicate You’re Dating Someone Avoidant

February 6, 2012 by  
Filed under DailyTarcher, How To

There are many telltale signs that indicate when you’ve met someone avoidant. Arthur Conan Doyle coined the term “smoking gun” in one of his Sherlock Holmes detective novels. A smoking gun has since become a reference for an object or a fact that serves as conclusive evidence of not just a crime but any type of undeniable proof. We like to call any signal or message that is highly indicative of avoidance a smoking gun:

Sends mixed messages—about his/her feelings toward you or about his/her commitment to you.

Longs for an ideal relationshipbut gives subtle hints that it will not be with you.

Desperately wants to meet “the one”but somehow always finds some fault in the other person or in the circumstances that makes commitment impossible.

Disregards your emotional well-being—and when confronted, continues to disregard it.

Suggests that you are “too needy,” “sensitive,” or “overreacting”—thus invalidating your feelings and making you second-guess yourself.

Ignores things you say that inconvenience him or her—doesn’t respond or changes the topic instead.

Addresses your concerns as “in a court of law”— responding to the facts without taking your feelings into account.

Your messages don’t get across—despite your best efforts to communicate your needs, he or she doesn’t seem to get the message or else ignores it.

Note that it is not specific behaviors that threaten to become smoking guns but rather an emotional stance—an ambiguity about the relationship that goes hand in hand with a strong message that your emotional needs are not so important to him or her. He or she may say the right things at times, but his/her actions tell a different story.

 

Purchase ATTACHED on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

HOW TO: Reconnect with Your Spouse, pt II – from Amir Levine, author of ATTACHED

January 26, 2012 by  
Filed under DailyTarcher, Great Ideas, How To

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and with it a slew of couples looking to do something special to help bring more passion into their relationship.

But this year, forget quick fixes to help ignite your love life for one day out of the year. See below for some very simple tips from ATTACHED author Amir Levine that can help you rekindle your love—and keep it that way, every day.

Read more

HOW TO: Reconnect with Your Spouse by Amir Levine, author of ATTACHED.

January 18, 2012 by  
Filed under DailyTarcher, Great Ideas, How To

 People often vow to make their relationships better around Valentines Day. This usually entails elaborate plans, expensive gifts and extravagant dates and getaways.   Couples try to “spice things up” with sexy lingerie or exotic vacations, but the results are short-lived at best or downright disappointing at worst. And to top it all off, they spend a lot of hard-earned money in the process.

With such high expectations from one event, it is no wonder we can’t live up to the hopes and fantasies we created around them.  Instead, try reconnecting with your partner in a much more economic and effective way, every day.  Scientific findings reveal different and much simpler strategies that are more likely to bring you the results you’re looking for.

Here are some very simple tips that can help you rekindle your love—and keep it that way.

  1. Sit at the corner table at a restaurant.  Find a way to spend some time super-close to your partner—so close that you’re touching.  Research findings shows that when we snuggle up to our mate, oxytocin is released.  This hormone and neuropeptide, also termed the “cuddle hormone” strengthens attachment and trust.  By being really close to your partner, you’re getting your oxytocin boost—and you’re enhancing your relationship all at the same time.  Other ways to get that oxytocin boost:
  2. When you’re watching TV together, give the recliner seat a pass and snuggle up close to your partner on the sofa instead.
  3. Linger in bed a bit longer on Sunday mornings.  The ipad can wait. Your emails are beckoning, but give everything else a pass for just a few minutes longer.  Trust us, this is more important!
  4. Spend at least two hours alone together every a week. It really doesn’t matter where. The important part is that you have no distractions—kids, technology, or work. Paradoxically, the more secure you feel in a relationship, the more you should follow this tip because it’s easier to lose track of one another when all’s well and your attention is directed outwards: to work, children, and hobbies. Don’t forget to refill that well you’re drawing your vitality from.

Purchase ATTACHED on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound.

Other recommended reads…

9781416550211WOMEN WHO LOVE TOO MUCH by Robin Norwood
This  a #1 New York Times bestseller that empowers women to ask these hard questions:
  • Do you find yourself attracted again and again to troubled, distant, moody men — while “nice guys” seem boring?
  • Do you obsess over men who are emotionally unavailable, addicted to work, hobbies, alcohol, or other women?
  • Do you neglect your friends and your own interests to be immediately available to him?
  • Do you feel empty without him, even though being with him is torment?

This groundbreaking work will enable you to recognize the roots of your destructive patterns of relating and provide you with a step-by-step guide to a more rewarding way of living and loving. Read more here!

OUT TODAY: Attached, The Jefferson Bible, Patience, The Prosperous Heart, Solving the Communion Enigma, and The Prosperity Bible

January 5, 2012 by  
Filed under Books, DailyTarcher

Though many relationship guides tell us how to date, few address the “why?” factor of relationships. That’s exactly what psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel Heller offer in their accessible and groundbreaking book, ATTACHED: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love, now available in paperback.

Combining facts and clear analysis with engaging personal stories from over 100 interviewees, ATTACHED is a fascinating read for anyone with an interest in the “why” behind their actions and relationships.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

 

In 1803 (and continuing for nearly two decades), Thomas Jefferson began one of the boldestreligious experiments in American history: cutting and pasting the teachings of Jesus Christ, as recorded in the Bible, into one compact statement.

This hardcover replica of THE JEFFERSON BIBLE restores to print a handsome, immensely accessible version of Jefferson’s manifesto as it was published for general readers in 1940.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

 

 


Patience
. It’s one of those qualities that people so often say they lack, and invariably find in short supply. One constantly hears cries of “I don’t have the patience for this!” or “I’m losing my patience.” Whether it is with our families, our co-workers, or ourselves, patience so often seems to abandon us when we need it most. But what if we could carve out a pathway to becoming more patient every day?

That is the very task author and Buddhist teacher Allan Lokos addresses with his new book, PATIENCE: The Art of Peaceful Living . Combining practical techniques and inspirational profiles, this unique book offers an in depth, yet accessible learning experience that touches all aspects of one’s life.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

 

In celebration of the 20th anniversary of her beloved international bestseller, The Artist’s Way, Julia Cameron has penned an all-new creativity program book that deals with this very concern: THE PROSPEROUS HEART: Creating a Life of “Enough” (Tarcher/Penguin hardcover, January 2012).

 Prosperity isn’t a fiscal bottom line, Cameron asserts. Rather, “prospering is something we can do, right now, today, no matter how much money we have.” To aid us in cultivating a prosperous heart, Cameron outlines an original 12-week program that addresses “the money question,” offering a new set of concrete tools and strategies to help usA practical and inspiring must-read, THE PROSPEROUS HEART shows readers how to develop a satisfying life that is both highly creative and financially sound.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

In 1987, Whitley Strieber changed the way we look at the universe with the publication of Communion, a bestselling account of his terrifying abductions and close encounters with extraterrestrials. Not only did his reports fascinate readers worldwide, they popularized the picture that we now think of when we envision extraterrestrials – the bauble-headed stick figures with enormous oval eyes that Strieber refers to as The Grays.

 In Solving the Communion Enigma: What is To Come, Strieber revisits his own encounters with The Grays, and examines the myriad ways they fit into a larger story of unexplained phenomena around the world; crop circles, mutilated livestock, mysterious aerial objects, abductions, and more. This book offers both a new look at some very personal, strange encounters, a big-picture view of the perplexing world today, and the world we’ll be inhabiting in the not-so-distant future. A must-read for anyone interested in the fate of mankind.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

Great minds in every generation have sought to answer the question, “How can I become wealthy?” Some tackled the question practically; others spiritually, or philosophically. Whatever their approach, people throughout the ages have listened, waiting for the insight that might change their lives.

Now in paperback, THE PROSPERITY BIBLE culls all that insight into one, inclusive volume. It presents readers with some of the best money-making secrets of all-time from legendary writers and experts like Benjamin Franklin, Napoleon Hill, P.T. Barnum, Wallace D. Wattles, and Ernest Holmes.

With 19 beloved classics in this convenient and affordable work, THE PROSPERITY BIBLE is an invaluable addition to the libraries of anyone looking to increase their wealth and better their lives.

Purchase on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indiebound

Next Page »